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Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise And Surprising Appeal Of Living Alone (2012)

by Eric Klinenberg(Favorite Author)

3.34 of 5 Votes: 3

ISBN

1594203229 (ISBN13: 9781594203220)

languge

English

genre

History & Biography

publisher

Penguin Press HC, The

review 1: I thought this would be relevant to my life. I didn't know it would be relevant to my work, which is finding housing for single disabled and/or elderly homeless persons with little to no family and social support. There were several sections focused on this population and SRO housing (single room occupancy), and supportive housing. There was a good history of the social services agency Common Ground in New York. A good case was made for the Housing First model and how it costs more public funds to keep people on the street than it does to house them. There was a descriptive section on the LA County Coroner and Public Administrator's role in investigating and cleaning up the lives of single adults who die alone. Those without resources or family to claim them are cremated a... morend kept in a closet for 4 years. Then they are buried together in a mass grave. Seems sad, but still we want to live alone.
review 2: The first half of this book had me doing Sylvester Stallone fist pumps in regards to my feelings about living alone. The second part had me hoping I would die before the age of 65, and the conclusion had me wanting to relocate to Stockholm, where I felt they took better care of their citizens at all life stages. America focuses on the nuclear family, which is completely understandable..if we lived in the 1950's. Modern lifestyles are changing and what if "we accepted the fact that living alone is a fundamental feature of modern societies and we simply did more to shield those who go solo from the main hazards of the condition? Isolation and insufficient care for frail, old, or impoverished singletons. Disconnection for those who want to participate in social activities but have lost their companions and don’t know how or where to find others. Stress and anxiety for single women who want a child but are nearing the limits of their reproductive years. Economic insecurity for those who lose a job and have no partner to support them." Some of the reviews said that they could've done without the second half, but I think that section was the most eye opening and impacting. I say, "Wake up!" This is the hard truth of what aging looks like in our country. And maybe I have such strong emotions and opinions about this because I have dealt first hand with nursing homes and trying to make decisions as a responsible child with how to go about providing my aging parents with sufficient care that is not going to make them feel like I threw them out with the trash, while also trying to make sure I don't end up broke and homeless in the process of paying for that care. So, yes, while we maybe could've seen more Lucy/Ethel assisted living relationships, I certainly understand the issues we are up against in the future. Anyone can end up living alone, whether through choice, divorce, a death, and we need to pay more attention to the policies that support our aging population. We all tend to think of old people as depressing and dreary, but helllooooo, we're all going to be there someday, and not all of us are going to have the resources or income to pay for what our housing market is charging for, in my opinion, rightful and sufficient care. I want to start supporting programs and policies that are going to be able to support me at any stage of my life. I shouldn't have to lose my dignity or independence as I age. I shouldn't have to fear for my safety or my health care if I live in a place that is supposed to care for me. I shouldn't have to feel isolated and detached from the world because I'm old and might have problems with mobility or god forbid, navigating new technology. I feel for all the older people who have no family or children to look out for them. I feel for all the older people who are poor, or who have serious health conditions or mental illness. They rely on the support of others, and we might be there ourselves one day, and at the very least know a friend, family member, or child who does end up there. Our country does not do a very good job at taking care of people who need government assistance or making them feel confident in themselves or their future. (I'm not talking all about funding, I'm taking about the management of these programs.) The harsh reality is this: if you don't have a family to depend on, or if you're not as healthy as a horse until the day you die, or if you don't have an income of over $100,000 after you retire, you're fucked. Annnddd, I feel like that's just wrong. Overall, I think this book is about the changing landscape of our demographics and what we are going to need to address in the future to accommodate it. Also, I feel more confident, even if the second part of the book is a little bleak, about my outlook on "going solo." There are so many societal pressures against independent living and this book addressed all of them and made me feel like I'm not alone in this experience. less

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