It’s no secret that us mothers tell some little white lies to our children. Sometimes it’s needed so we can avoid the tears and temper tantrums. I was out the other night and I started chatting with another mom about what us mothers fib about to keep things from our children. We were laughing for a good twenty minutes about it so I thought I’d share some to pass along. Some of these are honestly quite clever and I might start using some myself.
- Whenever my child wants some of my drink or snack, I tell him there is coffee in it. After that, he wants nothing to do with it
- Take a battery out of an annoyingly loud toy and tell them the toy is “taking a nap”
- Tell them you’re going “Number 2” so you can sit in the bathroom alone for 10 extra minutes (who hasn’t done this. Fathers included!)
- When you sneak a piece of candy and they ask what it is, tell them it’s spinach or that it’s spicy
- When you throw away some artwork, I tell my son they are going to the garbage men to hang up in their trucks
- When you throw away a toy and they ask where it is, tell them you sent it to Santa’s elves to fix
- If they touch any of the ornaments on the Christmas tree, it will take away the magic and Santa won’t come
- If their small pet dies, tell them they went to visit their animal parents
- If they lie, a red dot shows up on their forehead that only mommy and daddy can see
- The ice cream truck only plays music when it’s out of ice cream
- If my kid doesn’t behave in the drive-thru he will get a Sad Meal
- If they swallow their gum, bubbles will blow out of their butt
- If they unbuckle their seat belt in the car it will roll over
- If you carry them, their legs won’t grow
- Tell them they have a long-lost brother you dropped off at a gas station because they were being too loud in the car
- If they want to hear a song again, tell them the singer needs to rest their voice or they won’t be able to sing that song anymore
- If they don’t eat their vegetables, their birthday won’t come
- If they don’t sit still during a haircut, the barber will cut their ear off
- Tell them they need to keep an eye on you at all times while in the store so you don’t get kidnapped (no more wandering for them!)
- If they start whining, you’ll have to take them to the doctors to get a shot to dry their tears
Some of these are genius and I would have never thought of some of these myself. What are your secrets? I’d love to hear!
xo
