TGD Hopes Fellow Tough Guy Mike’s Upcoming Nuptials are Full of Love and Free of “Dynasty”-Style Bloodshed

Kevin: Although Tough Guy Digest has been around for less than a year, its origin can actually be traced back several years ago to a modest Upper East Side studio apartment, where Mike, Anthony, CJ, and myself would gather every couple of months and spend a Saturday reliving our favorite ‘80s and ‘90s action movies while getting royally shitfaced. Whether it was “The Last Boy Scout,” “Marked for Death,” “Road House,” “Tango & Cash,” or even the Clint Eastwood/Charlie Sheen masterpiece “The Rookie,” we always found new things to appreciate or laugh about (I think it took us about 5 hours to get through “Action Jackson” due to all the pausing and rewinding we did), even if the usual second beer run made the ability to articulate our thoughts harder than Ivan Drago’s punches.

I eventually moved back to Austin from New York, followed by CJ a couple of years later, and while we decided to take the spirit of our gatherings online, fortunately the crew will be back together this weekend to celebrate Mike’s wedding. I’m sure we’ll have very important discussions about what movies to cover in the next few months (I’m pushing “Beverly Hills Cop III” hard), but in the meantime as someone who has been in Mike’s shoes and felt the stress of making sure the event came off without a hitch, I’ll just reassure him that as long as his guests are not massacred by Moldavian terrorists – as happened to the Carringtons in the ‘80s staple “Dynasty” – he can consider this wedding a success:

Anybody have any other words of encouragement for the groom?

Anthony: Yeah so apparently CJ says we have to give some well wishes for his wedding? What the hell is that? I thought we were Tough Guy Digest, not Wuss Loser Weekly. Fine …

I’m happy that Mike found someone that can truly understand him. I’m happy that Mike found someone that can pick him up when he’s down. I’m happy that Mike found a person that makes his life worth living. But since he and I can’t be together all the time, I’m glad his wife can step in on a more permanent basis.

CJ: Speaking of, I’ll just say congrats to the future Mrs. Mike on locking down the only man who watches “Die Hard” and thinks it’s about deterring women from joining the work force. Here’s to many happy years together!

“This is what happens when you leave the kitchen sweetie.”

Kevin: Very touching, both of you. I’ll just conclude by letting Mike know this post counts as all of our wedding presents. You’re welcome buddy!

Actually this may have been a more painful wedding to watch than the one in “Dynasty.”

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