THE TEST: Uka Madam’s Tale (Short Story by Helen N. Okpala)

Mama’s Weekend Visit

She was reading in the sitting room not knowing it was raining outside. Soon after oga came in, she realized she hadn’t prepared food since morning but was rather lost in what she loves doing day in, day out – Facebooking. Oga just looked at her, gave her the ‘smh’ (shaking my head) look and walked quietly into his room.

She was lost in the story being shared and commented on, by fellow married ladies on social media. It was a group on Facebook where married women share their life experiences in marriage. She made a post about 10 minutes ago, waiting on comments to rain in. She had pleaded with the admin of the group to approve her post, but nothing yet.

After waiting on both approval of her post and comments to no avail, she had no choice than to go prepare ‘Amala and Efo Riro’ for oga, forgetting what he had called her on phone to prepare for him and his mum. Of course, the soup had been brought out of the freezer. Oh, freezer I just said? The old, brown freezer which she inherited from her uncle during their wedding had just developed some major issues. Oga had given her money to repair it, but she thought it was the duty of the man to do the ‘hard job’ at home while the ‘soft work’ was for the woman. That’s story for another day anyway.

While in the kitchen, madam heard her phone vibrate.  She quickly ran out of the kitchen, leaving the boiling water in the pot, and the soup warming too, while the burners were still on. Meanwhile, that was the last bowl of soup she got out from the freezer. Ekaite  had travelled to the village. So, nobody to order around with such words as: ‘turn off the burner, peel the yam, bring the match box, clean the table, wash oga’s boxers and my undies, wash the plate, wake me up about 30 minutes before oga comes home so I can prepare his meal, etc’. It was then a challenge to her as she had gotten used to Ekaite’s  running around in the home.

‘Oh my Goooood God!’ She shouted. ‘Admin has approved my post finally. Omo…see comments ooooo. Wow! 76 comments in 5 minutes?  This food must wait o. Thank God hubby is making call in his room’.  Meanwhile, oga had informed madam that his mum was coming to pass the weekend with them and she should prepare a fresh soup for the weekend, although he forgot to give her the money she asked for. As madam was busy laughing over people’s comments on her post, a knock came: ‘’Knock knock knocki oooooo…na who dey house?’ The ‘knocker’ after five minutes of receiving no answer, decided to wake oga from sleep with a phone call: ‘my son, please, what is smelling from your kitchen? It’s like Ekaite is not at home? I have been standing here and knocking for ages ooooo. Why can’t a human being open the door for me, or you are not at home too? I am very hungry, please come and open the door for me before I pass out’.

Uka madam was in the sitting room and as soon as she heard her hubby’s footsteps, turned off her phone and rushed to the kitchen and the story continues in the next chapter……

Watch this space!

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