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Becoming Us (2009)

by Anah Crow(Favorite Author)

3.46 of 5 Votes: 3

ISBN

1603708286 (ISBN13: 9781603708289)

languge

English

genre

Romance

publisher

Torquere Press

review 1: I don't like to rate books unless I liked them on a second and third reading and put them aside to read again (that's good - 4-5 stars). So, just a few reactions to this... It's a very physical story in that the characters are successfully constructed through their bodies, gestures, looks. Nice that they were athletes too, good way to explain this and make them pretty-in-body too. I like swimmers.And I get what the writers were trying to do overall, or at least I think I do -- the evolving relationship, and especially the difficult coming out of one of the two, is expressed and described and experienced in their sex and other physical interactions (cuddling -- much remarked upon, a little too much). But I guess the sex got repetitive, as in too much of it, and that's under... morestandable given how important it was to the psychological plot, but I started skipping the sex scenes - gah! As with the one other book I've read by Crow and Fox, the focus was clear and consistent, at big plus.
review 2: Bottom line up front:There was crying. Lots of it. Bryce was slinging snot through pretty much the whole story. I hate crying guys, really I do. So why did I love this book so much?The rest:Zac and one of his room mates, Perry, came out during Zac's junior year. For the rest of the year, things were a bit strained between him and his best friend, Bryce. Summer is over and they're going into their senior year. Not wanting another awkward year, and missing his best friend, Zac determines to clear the air between them. Somehow, that clearing the air ended up with him falling in love with his best friend and having to fight all year to try to get Bryce to calm the heck down and just be his boyfriend.Bryce the Emo Swimmer was raised in a family where his father dictates everything and the sons sort of fall in line. He had the misfortune of not only being born last, but also being named after a formerly favored uncle who later came out. Because of this, he endured years of cruel taunts from his older and more assholic (is that a word?) brothers about how Bryce was somehow automatically gay.Now poor Bryce is seriously screwed in the head and had almost daily breakdowns and panic attacks because kissing was great. Then touching the naughty bits felt good. Then he started crying because sticking his boy bits into somebody's bum was zomg!amazing. And after that, Zac made an offhand comment about maybe sometime in the distant future returning the favor and putting fingers and cocks in Bryce's ass, which set him off again. In between all this, Bryce has multiple mini anxiety attacks after a phone call from his father. His controlling dad read Zac's interview about being a gay athlete in a magazine and now wants Bryce to move out. Preferably before his speshul snowflake son is tainted by the gay germs.Many of Bryce's internal conversations were some variation of this one: He was serious about Zac, and he didn’t know how serious Zac was about him. He didn’t want to seem like a girl, getting all emotional about taking the step to fucking, getting emotional about dating and being together. He hated what a loser he was and kept cramming it down inside and hoping no one noticed.Despite my almost instinctive and virulent dislike of long, drawn out pity parties, I found myself drawn to Bryce as a character, and empathizing with the situation he was in. There was a man whom he cared deeply for, and he genuinely wanted to explore that relationship to see where it went. On the other hand, his father was paying his tuition and housing expenses while he was in college. After college, Bryce was expecting to work for his father. He already knew that his father would react negatively to any declaration of love for another man. His father, after all, disowned his own brother after the guy came out. Bryce had every reasonable expectation that the same thing would happen to him. It's senior year of college, and Bryce had no way to support either himself or his boyfriend if the funds got cut off. All that aside, Bryce actually liked his asshole brothers and controlling father. It hurt. Even if he wanted to come out, he couldn’t. Not until he was ready to give up his family. Fucked up as they were, they were still his family. And Zac. It felt like he was saying Zac wasn’t worth it. How was he supposed to compare?While Zac and Bryce are involved in a hot and heavy relationship, neither is precisely gay either. Zac would more accurately be described as bi. Bryce very vaguely referred to situations in the past where he might have had a glimmer of attraction for other males, but rather ruthlessly suppressed it for fear of being booted out of his family and disowned like his uncle. There was a scene where Bryce had pity sex with an ex-girlfriend, and enjoyed it as much as he ever had.Becoming Us is a deeply emotional story about a guy who was in a no win situation, and had to think long and hard about the choice he was about to make. There is no easy way out, and the consequences of picking either road were essentially untenable. I found myself deeply immersed in Bryce's struggle and, although I wasn't crying along with him, I certainly understood his frustration and need to vent.The writing duo of Crow and Fox provide deep, thought provoking stories that interest and enthrall. This book was a refreshing change from fluffy stories of pretty boys rubbing off on each other, and will be crying it's way onto the keeper shelf. I highly recommend this book...but save it for when you're not already emotionally drained, because this book will pull it out of you.As an odd side note...the story is actually rated chile pepper on TQ's ridiculous rating for the heat of books. I thought the sex scenes were holy wow smoking hot, but what the heck do I know?? less

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