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This Is How You Lose Her (2012)

by Junot Díaz(Favorite Author)

3.26 of 5 Votes: 6

ISBN

1594487367 (ISBN13: 9781594487361)

languge

English

genre

Fiction

publisher

Riverhead Books

review 1: This story follows two main characters; Yunior and Yasmin. Yunior is a player who sees no problem with cheating. All the men in his life have cheated; even his brother, who he looked up to at first, was a womanizer. He takes us through stories throughout his childhood. He talks about his brother getting cancer, running away, stealing from his family, etc; his older neighbor that he frequently hooks up with; his childhood and how his fathers treatment towards his mother, himself, and his siblings shaped his view on how relationships are; and mentions many more stories that helped shape him into the person he is today. In the end, we see that he is in love with his girlfriend of 6 years, Magda, but they are having problems keeping the spark alive in their relationship. She s... moreoon finds out he cheated on her with over 50 times, with multiple different women throughout the years. At first, Magda is angry but tries to save their relationship and suggests they take a vacation. They go, but both Yunior and his girlfriend know it is already over. At the end of the trip, she officially breaks up with him and he looses it completely. He desperately tries to get her back, but she refuses his offers. He starts exercising, and although it helps at first, he develops health problems that later on prevent him from exercising the way he used to. He falls back into his depression. Throughout the years, he still tries to contact her and spends countless sleepless nights crying and thinking about Magda. Eventually, he uses writing to help get over his loss, but he will always remember her. He also has a friend who is in a loveless marriage with a wife that hasn't given him any kids yet, but he took a vacation to South America and hooked up with a girl who later on has a baby boy. He is ecstatic, seeing as he's always wanted to have a son. He plans on telling his wife after he takes another trip to see his son. He was very happy, he brought along suitcases filled with toys and presents for the boy, and he even brought Yunior along with him. However, when he gets there, he finds out the boy is not his and is devastated. Yunior supports him and helps him get through it, and his friend returns the favor after Yunior gets dumped. The other character, Yasmin, is an immigrant living in a small rental house with many other illegal immigrants. She has a boyfriend, another immigrant from Santa Domingo. He had a wife back home, and they had a small child together. However, his little boy died very young and his wife is going through very tough times, especially without her husband to support her. She doesn't know about Yasmin's affair with her husband, and I personally think its best that way. She works at a laundromat, along with other immigrants struggling to survive. She sees many different types of people; some kind and grateful, some who cry all day, some who hate their life; and eventually, we run into one teenager who "borrows" money from Yasmin, then takes off back to South America. Her and her boyfriend wish to have a house of their own, but they are a very poor and it takes them almost the entire book to earn enough money for a very small, run-down apartment. Overall, I really liked the book, but it angered me a lot. I never have and never will understand why men cheat on women, especially ones they claim they love. Yunior is one of those characters that you make you feel very sorry for him half the time, then want to strangle him the other half. Though he's had a very rough life, that does not excuse the way he treats women. He states many times that all girls know that "all Dominican men cheat" and say they know better than to date him. However, he still gets many girls throughout his life and hurts most of them. I cannot sympathize with cheaters, therefore, I was actually happy to read him suffer. I wanted him to hurt, because I knew no matter how upset he was, poor Magda was feeling 100x worse. The times I did sympathize with him was throughout his childhood. His father never really treated them like his own children, more like robots or slaves he always had to control. And he treated the mother even worse. This definitely affected how Yunior viewed women and relationships, but theres never an excuse to do that to somebody. It was very interesting though, being in the minds of a cheater and seeing how they think. Even though I could never see myself cheating, it was still fascinating to see how he rationalizes it. Yasmin had me angry too because even though she had a very laborious and hard life, she should not use that as an excuse to ruin someone else's. I felt terrible for her boyfriends wife back home, waiting for her husband to come back while he's out here sleeping with another women. This got me angry thinking how she already has had her son pass, and now she doesn't even have a good husband to help her through it. It was very interesting seeing how Yasmin works and functions day to day life. Some things we take for granted are rare pleasures for her, but at least she does have one very good friend that helps her through her rough times. The author, Junot Diaz, didn't really mention Yasmin that much, but I wish the book was a little longer so we could have heard more about her. Overall, I really liked this book because there was never a dull moment and it got my full attention and emotions stirred. I recommend this to anyone that likes to get involved in a unique story that follows two different types of characters with some similar problems. As long as you don't mind getting your emotions involved in the story, you will love this book as much as I did.
review 2: This book was on every list of "what to read after a breakup" but it was so depressing that I have no idea why. Every review online said you'd get to understand why 20 something guys have a hard time with love or something to that effect, but I don't want to read about how he cheats on every girl he's with and takes them for granted. Some fantastic writing, but not my favorite storyline/character. less

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