I Love Her But… Part 4

‘I feel happy & in the moment,’ Nancy says beaming proudly eating her dark chocolate cake with vanilla ice-cream.

Aroma reminds me of sweet cocoa, honey and roasted nuts. She’s rubbing off on me. I can see taste in scents.

‘I know what you mean,’ I say lightly but my heart is heavy.

Hands gripping the chair underneath the table hard af trying not to snap it. Warmth & solidness flow underneath me.

My heart is racing to keep eye contact with her.  Walking a tightrope suspended in the sky.

I really care about her.

I might drop everything that I’ve been juggling around her. 

Hell has no fury like a woman scorned.


Last year

‘You douche&*@,’ Lisa is livid standing in my dining room standing a black knife on a red kitchen board.

White onions sizzling hard on the pan. They’re a shade away from turning ashy black. Tomatoes sitting on the chopping oozing red juice. Large chunks sliced and diced by the knife.

I can hear that quavering undertone in her voice. 

Have you ever broken a girl so bad that you can see her face struggling with herself? She’s pissed beyond belief but her eyes are so glassy. She’d drown you in her tears if she could.

Stacy is seated on a brown leather sofa with her legs crossed. Wearing a white sweater that hugs her pretty well sipping on sugar-free black coffee.

She insisted on sticking around because the ‘latest one’ felt like a bit of ‘a live wire.’

How can one be everything?


Early That Day

Earlier on, watching TV,  Stacy warned me that I needed to leave her.

‘It won’t work out,’ Stacy said bluntly ‘cut your losses and move on.’

‘Don’t go there,’ I warn her through gritted teeth.

‘I already did,’ she says without mincing words.

‘Stacy, when-,’ I’m staying calm and straightening my back on the sofa

‘-I’m just telling,’ she cuts into me as her fingers dip into the bowl of caramel popcorn.

‘-drop it, know your-‘ I start warning her gently.

‘-know my place. I thought you were more original than that.,’ she smirks as she finishes off and throws popcorn in her mouth.

-i’m sorry, I didn’t-,’ I apologise quickly.

Her ex used to say things like that and I’m not one of those guys. Stacy has a clear place in my life. I’ll keep it that way.

‘-I can meet her & leave’, she suggests softer than she usually is.

That’s my girl.


Later That Day

‘Lisa, calm down, you’ve always known,’ I tell her in exasperation.

‘Did you come out and say it?’ She questions me with fire chasing water in her eyes.

Stacy pauses munching away on her popcorn and lowers the volume on the television.



I snap back and notice Nancy has a peaceful glow on her face. Her plate is cleared with brown smudges. No knives in sight.

I reach out and give Nancy’s hand a little squeeze and smile.

‘The other guys are looking at you,’ I tease her gently.

‘Let them,’ she adds without a care in the world.


This is part of a short story. Click here for Part One or Part Three, if you like reading in reverse. Check out our Facebook page. 

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