The Secret of Change!

We all know if we keep doing the things we are doing, the same way we are doing them, we remain as we are, have what we have, and commit ourselves to exploits only of the imaginary.

Those who have wrestled challenges into cooperation enjoy the benefits of tangible fruit. The deep satisfaction that comes from seeing ideas, hopes, and dreams take on reality can leave a person breathless and oxygenated at the same time. I find it easy to celebrate the successes of anyone that pours themselves into excellence. I know what it takes to face yourself, overcome obstacles, and refuse to settle. If you beat the odds, you’ll have me jumping for joy right along with you!

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Navigating the twists and turns of life without losing forward momentum is an admirable trait. I’ve witnessed those rare individuals who make it look easy but, closer scrutiny reveals it’s an illusion. They’re operating under a very different paradigm than the average fellow. While remarkable results usually include a strong work ethic, we shouldn’t overlook other principles.

What’s the secret? You ask. Let’s start by backing up a little. Any honest self-reflection will include taking inventory, in reality. “You can do anything you set your mind to!”  We’ve all heard this, felt the twinge of excitement brought on by the very suggestion. But, is it true? I find there are elements, common dynamics, and systematic traits with people that reach the highest levels. It does, in fact, take a resolute mind. However, there is more to the story than meets the casual eye.

Dr. Liza Siegel, the psychologist for the hit reality shows “The Apprentice” and “Survivor,” has had a front-row seat to what it takes to succeed, and what to do when at first you don’t succeed. In her book Suite Success, Dr. Siegel lays out six essential psychological characteristics of successful people. They are Optimism, Creativity, Resilience, Self-Control, Emotional Awareness, and Sociability. You may want to read all about these categories in her book Suite Success: The Psychologist from “The Apprentice’ Reveals What It Takes to Excel – in the Boardroom and in Life.” (Available on Amazon)

Garret Kramer, the noted sports Psychologist, and Coach have recently caught my attention. In his latest book “The Path of No Resistance” Garret enunciates that its insight, and not intellect that fuels our ability to achieve. I had to dig into Garrett’s train of thought to understand his “inside-out” model. Being a subscriber to self-help principles, it took some careful consideration before I could admit that many of the strategies I adhere to were not working. I’m thankful to have discovered this insight.

I listened to a Ted Talk by Richard St. John. Richard spent ten years interviewing over five hundred successful people and then analyzed the data resulting in identifiable characteristics. In his book 8 To Be Great: The 8-Traits That Lead to Great Success, he lists them for us: Passion for what you do. Work hard and have fun. Focus on one thing – not everything. Push yourself out of your comfort zone. Consistently coming up with new ideas. Constantly improve. Provide value to others. Persist through failure.

An article I read by, Ciara Conlon, on lifehack.org offered one of the more comical takes on the attributes of highly successful people. They are early risers. The “Mind over Mattress” reference she makes can’t go unacknowledged. Getting up just one hour earlier each day gains 15 days a year. I have always been an early riser. For me, it has been effortless. I love the fewer distractions during the wee hours. I do understand the challenge this poses for anyone clamoring for a few more minutes of pillow time.

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“If you do not change your direction, you may end up where you are going.” ~Lao Tzu.

Before climbing every mountain, I passed through the valley below. These highs and lows have been the perpetual classrooms of my education. Forming the experiences of my life. I’ve been able to tabulate a few absolutes throughout my six decades of mounting the impossible, facing my fears, and relishing in moments of jubilation. My trials, errors, and awakening may not be everyone else’s normal… it certainly is mine.

As I continue to discover life’s deeper meaning and caress understanding, I live more and more intentional. If I had to step through the many concepts of success principles and offer only one as a gift to others my tip, from personal experience would be this, find the “why” of your life. Almost everyone can explain what they do, write, sing, sew, etc. Others can even talk about how they do things. But, knowing why you do what you do is what separates distinction from mediocrity.

Why are you here? Simon Sinek, (Ted Talk) uses what he calls the golden circle to explain the concept of why. He asks, what’s your cause, your belief, your purpose? Why do you get out of bed in the morning and, why should anyone care? I can tell you it’s not accolades, fame, or even profits. Most people start with what, move to how, and maybe get to why illustrates the “outside in” predominance.

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We all deserve to find our place in the universe, to offer our unique contribution to serving others, and create the world of our dreams. Recognizing the temptation to dally in external factors and strategies affords us the opportunity to cancel distractions. Authenticity, success, and contentment is an inside job. Reversing the trend of utilizing the least essentials first will put us on the right track.

The secret of change is discovering your why!

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This article originally appeared in Read My Mind Magazine.

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