Dear WordPress…
Your mobile app is flaky. I know, I know, I use the 18-month-old iPhone SE, running iOS 9.x, and you’re in a hurry to leave me in the dust. Or at least, you’re not concerned about being inclusive.
I don’t know what the deal is. Maybe you’re in cahoots with the browser developers, who are no doubt in cahoots with device manufacturers to keep up the Tech Arms Race. Apple’s stock doesn’t go up much when people don’t buy a new phone every year, after all. But since I don’t have stock in Apple, it doesn’t benefit me to keep shelling out more money for a new phone that’s built for the latest iOS just so that your mobile app will work for…
…about 2 months. Maybe 3, if I’m lucky. On a sidenote (or not), it’s funny how you don’t wait for 2 or 3 months before asking me to review your app to gauge my satisfaction with using it. Instead, those “review app?” prompts always hit within the first day or two of my downloading it. You don’t wait until I’ve had the chance to build an overall impression. It’s almost like you know it’s not going to work flawlessly for long, so you strike while the iron is hot.
I made the mistake of reviewing the app when I was prompted during the first day or two. At that point, it was the most current version of the app, and my hardware and software were new and current, too. Everything matched, everything synched, and dammit, people liked it! Including me. Woot.
I’m no dull cookie, though, and I realized that within a few months after giving that sterling 5-starry review, complete with gushing about how great it was, all smooth and integrated and flawless like that…
…it got flaky. It failed to log that I had already “liked” a post. It failed to calculate the actual amount of time elapsed since I had posted my last post. It failed to register my comments on peoples’ blog posts (and these were not blogs that required moderation of every comment, either). It froze. It quit without warning, rudely condemning me to my home screen. It did other funky shit that I can’t currently remember.
Finally, WP, I contacted your support team. The first thing any software developer support team asks you when you have a problem is, “are you running the most current version of the app?” Part of this is legit; some apps have been known to have bugs, and some app updates have been written specifically to address those bugs.
But some of that is NOT legit. Some of that is part of their training, ordered from the top-down (i.e., your executives, who are beholden to shareholders only), in a collusion to get the consumer base to update the app more often, and some of those new app updates don’t improve the user experience at all. Sometimes they contain bugs that go unfixed, and instead, they contain ever-increasing amounts of tracking and data-mining capabilities, or perhaps ads or adblock-thwarting measures. I’ve seen that before.
Ugh. Finally, I gave in and went hunting through my available app updates (which I never do, and for good reason–I’ve done it before, regretted it every time, and I won’t get fooled again). The WordPress app was nowhere to be found in the list of available updates. I contacted your “support team” once more; they stated that the iOS (iPhone operating system) that I was running might be out of date, and the WordPress app development team is no longer supporting that particular iOS.
What?? I had gotten my iPhone (SE), brand-new, only 6 months prior. Unacceptable, guys.
So, in desperation, I deleted and reinstalled the app. Hmmm. Looks like it’s been updated after all, but it hadn’t been available in my “Updates” list. Installing a fresh version, however, did the trick.
And then, WordPress, you did the usual trick of your own: you asked me to review the app within the first few days of my having downloaded it.
Look, WP. I haven’t had the chance to use it for more than a couple of days. I don’t actually know if it’s going to be a great experience or not, because for me, a great user experience isn’t just about a well-functioning app. It’s about how well that app can maintain a high level of reliability of that great function over time. In short: can I count on this app to be great for more than a few weeks or months? Can I count on it to deliver its promise for about, say, 9 months to a year? If not, I’m not giving you 5 stars. And don’t ask me for a review until at least 3-6 months into my user-ship of the app.
So when the “review us!” prompt popped up early on, I declined it this time. “Maybe later,” I clicked.
I notice you didn’t ask me again. That prompt never returned. I thought for sure that it would, maybe a month later, but it didn’t. Ever.
Wait a minute – I thought you were excited to get my opinion! To hear my voice! To revel in my praise of your app.
Maybe not so much. Because maybe, WP, you know that your app is going to tank after a short time, and maybe once that happens, you’re not exactly so interested to hear my honest opinion after all. Maybe this is an attempt to manipulate ratings, slanting the feedback more in your favor so that when you’re called out on your lack of stability or constant updating or what-have-you, you can point to your “data” of hundreds or even thousands of 4.5 or 5-star ratings and glorious comments and say, “problem? What problem? Thousands of your fellow users disagree with you!”
Heh.
I’m not falling for the banana in the tailpipe (a reference to the original Beverly Hills Cop).
You’re not as cool as you seem, nor quite as cool as you believe to be. At least, not if the user actually continues to use your app long-term.
Signed,
*Sigh*ing WP user
