Reflections on a passing year

As I step into this New Year, I cannot help but reflect on the intensity and the abundance of 2017. This year offered up many lessons, gifts and growth. It also showed me how fear, anxieties and doubt can cause internal havoc and deplete my source of strength and power. The abundance came in revelations, teachers, guides, and the realization that my life starts with me.

I realized the fullness of my responsibility for my life this year. My choices, my thoughts, my decisions, my perspectives, my anger, my frustrations, my victimhood, my need to be right, my need to defend, my feelings and my entitlements. They all belong to me and have helped me to see THE WORK THAT I NEED TO DO. My spiritual practice grew. I meditated with consistency. I prayed more. I stretched more. I let go of more. I leaned in with less resistance. I gave more. I shared more. I made more stuff. I wrote more. I asked for help more. I took more risks.

Emotions still swayed me and I still got hella triggered. But I was ok with that. I realized my own power and that didn’t make me above anyone. I felt more grateful for the hard times this year and for the things they revealed to me. I connected with purpose. I made friends with fear, finally. I wasn’t avoiding her as much. I, kind of, went with the flow more. When I say “more”, I mean I was aware of it this time around.

I started a tradition last year that I was excited to pick up again. When it came time, I made a list of reflections, a way to pat myself on the back and acknowledge all the ways I’ve grown. I believe that it does not serve us to look in overarching optimism to the future when we have not fully celebrated the ground that we’ve covered in the recent past. With this intention, I offer you some of my reflections of 2017:

  • It is not my right to offer help when it is not asked.
  • Set boundaries with difficult people. They are here to show you how you give your power away.
  • Best to listen before speaking.
  • Sharing an experience with someone means that that experience will ultimately change once you add another person. You can never share the experience and get the same result as you expected.
  • Your path will not be straight. You cannot plan your life the way you see it best. Your path will swerve and slow down and take an unexpected turn but it will always get you where you need to be.
  • The unknown is scary because you don’t see the potential and abundance of what will come after you step into it. Fear is a guide to let you know that there is a door that needs to be opened.
  • Thank fear because she is always on your side of your potential.
  • When starting a big writing project, just do the shitty version first.
  • God is in the interruptions of the day. Every detail has meaning.
  • If it is too hard, it is not meant to be done this way.
  • Doubt will always be there. Don’t invest too much energy in her. You will always prove doubt right.
  • Hello Eternal Loving Presence (HELP Prayer) – Michael Beckwith
  • Creativity will always lead you through darkness.
  • You can’t control or change someone. Never. Ever. You can only change the way you react to that situation.
  • Always ask questions.
  • Imagine a bright light around the ones you love. Always start there. They will respond accordingly. Don’t hold back your loving words & gestures; they will only react to your hesitation.
  • Be very specific what you ask in your prayers. This is not a time to be vague.
  • Stand back and take your place when it comes to the lives of those you love. It’s not your place to judge or resist. Accept the abundance of lessons that their path is unfolding.
  • Know your shadow and the tools it uses to convince you it is right.
  • Say sorry and move on.
  • I AM (whatever follows is your own reality)
  • Let go of your expectations of people. This habit, and it is YOUR habit and no one else’s, will only lead to continuous pain & disappointment. Also see #14.
  • Saying “I am uncomfortable” is the first step to self-liberation.
  • Why swim when you can float?
  • Set intentions, not expectations.
  • Never, ever, ever, ever think you that you are better, kinder, and wiser than the next person. The Universe will always find the perfect way to humble yo’ ass.
  • Gratitude for the blessings of each day, the messengers who deliver them, for all that you receive, for the gifts that open your eyes, for the love that resonates within, for sharing these treasures and continuing to sing my song. Gratitude for all the details.
  • The depth of darkness teaches us so much. Don’t be afraid to go there and be there. Share light with the darkness and magical things are sure to be made in that interaction.
  • If you can imagine it, you can create it.
  • I am open and trusting of the Divine. Lead me and I will follow.
  • Keep drawing, keep creating, keep moving, keep dreaming. You don’t need to know how to make a living off it, just keep feeding your soul. If you don’t make space for inspiration in your life then it won’t find a home in you.
  • Keep talking to the Divine through prayer, meditation, reflection, contemplation, creativity, curiosity, and joy.
  • You are part of the ONE and you know it. Work with what you have to help the world see this sacred truth, this oneness. All is One and One is All.
  • Get out of your own way!
  • Be mindful of the energy you invest in your thoughts for they will take you on a winding road to nowhere.
  • Vulnerability is a great teacher. When you are open and accepting of your darkness, you can hold space for other people’s darkness. Similarly, when you are able to bask in the glory of your own light and stand in your own truth, you will appreciate the radiance of others.
  • I feel so blessed and grateful for the ground I’ve covered; the hard times were especially revealing of my spirit, my strength, my power and my purpose. I step into the new year with confidence that I have the tools necessary to get through the lessons that are asked of me to learn. I am open and trusting that my soul has a song to sing on this earth at this time and the Source of All will guide me to find my true voice.

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