Today is one of those negative days again. I am trying very hard to focus on the positive with all the excitement. But today I am really struggling again. Lately, everything is just getting on my nerves – probably all this wedding stuff. I don’t know. A bit of a short temper, then next moment I am the sweetest again. Yep, pretty bipolar at the moment.
So apparently everyone went to a family gathering. At first, i was like “okay cool, enjoy”. Then I hear everybody is there….. except us. Yes. Reason to be upset? No. Reason to feel excluded? Yes.
So here I am back again thinking that this whole wedding thing is just interfering with everybody’s lives. Like a type of countdown to “yaaaaay we can soon get on with our lives”. IT.SUCKS.
For 4 odd years, I used to work 3 weekends in a month. Guilt trips were definitely thrown at me and “you can make a plan”. I missed a lot of family stuff for most of those 4 years. It sucks because so much can happen in a month so how about 4 years? If I could take that back I would. Unfortunately, I wasted a LOT of time at that stupid job. You have to make money and family gatherings to pay the bills. But still. A family is just so important. I guess I am not back in the circle yet.
The other day we received an invite for another family thing and us, unfortunately, can not attend. So my reply was, unfortunately, no. The message I got back though threw me. It was like – yeah we know but at least you can’t say we didn’t invite you. Uhm…. thanks? What happened to sincerity? I probably read too much into it but the way you word something can really make you misinterprets someone’s meaning. I have just blown away. Invite me and rather just say “I know you can’t attend but we will miss you, enjoy your vacation”. Not really having a happy moment.
I know I said that I will try and stop with the negative posts. The whole point I started this blog was to also let go of feelings that made me feel like a happy sad bride. Life does not always rock. It does not always suck. Today… it just disappointed me. Tomorrow will be better and something good WILL happen. Today, I just feel sad again about everybody’s lack of interest in our life.
Tommorw will be less sad
