If you’re just joining us, then you’ve got some catching up to do. Please read my previous posts about how I made the decision to start the search for my biological parents before you read this one, because *spoiler alert* there’s been some developments – shout out to Lexi from Christian Family Care. And if you don’t know who Lexi is, then that’s why you gotta go back and read!
Thank you again to all of you that have sent messages of support and love – ya’ll the real MVP’s. I really am blessed.
If I can digress for a moment, I want to share some thoughts – and to keep you all on your toes, obvi. Tomorrow is my 31st birthday. I’ve spent the past few weeks reflecting a lot on my life thus far. Maybe it’s just me, but as I get older, I find myself reflecting on the “Thank God that happened” moments rather than questioning the “What if” moments and hypothetical’s. If there’s anything that I’ve learned in the past three decades, it’s that the moments in life we experience are made even more special by the people you experience those moments with. I’ve talked a lot about my Mom in this blog, and I guess in a way this has been therapeutic in helping cope with losing her 6 years ago. My friends know I wear my heart on my sleeve and I get that from my Mom. So again, thank you for letting me share my heart with you all.
So speaking of birthdays, it’s no secret I’m an only child. My parents once approached me about the possibility of having a younger sibling, to which my response was, “No – because I wouldn’t get as many toys.” This happened when I was around 15…JK. I was like 6 for this convo, but some of you only-child-critics probably believed me. SMH. I’m not sure if there was a specific reason why my parents didn’t adopt again, but I do know that they were both incredibly busy with the Air Force, and my dad was getting ready to get deployed to Desert Storm at the time.
I’d like to think that I’m not your typical only-child (though my wife and close friends may be able to identify some discrepancies); my parents taught me to always be thankful for the little things, to work hard for what I wanted, and to always treat others the way I would want to be treated. We only children get a bad rep is what I’m getting at here haha.
Well enough reflecting, let’s talk about Nov. 21st, 2017 because I know a lot of folks have patiently waited.
I was at work at the community college (I work there twice a week) when my phone rang. I saw that it was a 602 number, so I figured it was one of my students calling to cancel or maybe they couldn’t find me for our appointment. The voice on the other end was someone I never heard before, and she went through her introduction so quickly I still didn’t quite understand who I was talking to. I replied a few times, “Wait, who is this?” Here’s a brief excerpt of the conversation:
“It’s Lexi – with Christian Family Care. We’ve been talking about trying to find your biological parents?” – Lexi
“Oh! Lexi! Yes, hi how are you today?” – Me, as my heart rate increased.
“Your biological father reached out to me. He wants to get in touch.” – Lexi
“Uh, wow. Uh yeah, uh okay. Um so, so what do we do, what do I do?” – Me
“Well he mentioned he tried to get a hold of you before but it didn’t happen. And he wanted to tell his wife and daughter about you too before moving forward.” – Lexi
*Nearly drops the phone* – Me
“Are you still there, Matthew?” – Lexi
“Yeah, yeah I’m still here. What do I do?” – Me, fumbling through words and emotions all at the same time.
“I’ll send you both some ‘Consent to Contact’ paperwork and we’ll go from there.” – Lexi
“Okay. Sounds good. Is there any word yet from my biological mother?” – Me
“Not yet but I’ll still be working on it. I’ll be in touch, and I’m so glad I could help you get in contact with your biological father!.” – Lexi
“Yes, thank you for everything, it means a lot. Have a good one.” *click* – Me
I messaged my wife right away: “I need to call you, NOW. I heard back from the adoption agency.” Through some mumbled words and tears of mixed emotions, I told her I had a half-sister somewhere out there. Holy shit.
This was going to be a crazy Thanksgiving and holiday season for sure.
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