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Shamed: The Honour Killing That Shocked Britain - By The Sister Who Fought For Justice (2013)

by Sarbjit Kaur Athwal(Favorite Author)

4.22 of 5 Votes: 5

ISBN

0753541548 (ISBN13: 9780753541548)

languge

English

genre

Nonfiction

publisher

Virgin Books

review 1: The harrowing true story of an "honour" killing.When Sarbjit's family send her to India as a young girl to be "trained" in Indian ways and culture she knew something was going on.After numerous promises of going home soon she finally gives up hope but then one day her father out of the blue arrives to collect her but then when she hits the UK again things get drastically worse, her family have lined up a procession of suitors one of whom she is expected to marry, no argument.She is eventually talked into marrying Hardave Athwal, from the first she is unsure and even tells her family there is something about the family she doesn't like but things are out of her control and the marriage takes place.Married life is just as bad as she expects and the driving force is the matri... morearch Bachan Kaur, life runs according to her rules once her husband died, by Sikh law when the father dies the eldest brother takes over family affairs but she has bypassed her eldest Sukhdave.Things rattle along and Sarbjit finds some comfort in the company of her sister in law Surjit who also lives in the family home.Until that is until Surjit by the community Sikh rules starts rebelling and living a more Western lifestyle, even falling in love and subsequently getting pregnant by a married man due to her unhappiness at the maltreatment of Sukhdave.A family meeting that includes Sarbjit in the secret implies that Surjit is going "to be taken care of" as she has shamed the family honour.Sarbjt in a total panic and outright fear doesn't know what to do to help her and even anonymously calls Crimestoppers hoping to save her life but the day comes when the family take a "trip" to India and Surjit doesn't come home.Consequently follows many years of threats, abuse and mental torture to keep the "family secret" and not bring shame on their good name.Finally Sarbjit cannot cope any longer and finally snaps to the point she takes action.After years of feeling alone she finds the courage to speak out and aid the police in an exhaustive investigation into Surjit's murder, the only snag is that Sarbjit has to stay put with the Athwal murderers while a case is built against them to make sure they do not evade the law.Can her nerve hold or will the family find out what she has done and take revenge?Brutal, horrific and very sad this a great read of one woman's strength and courage under the most terrible circumstances imaginable. Definitely worth reading.
review 2: Did this really happen in a country that has devolved 'policing' to the police for nearly 200 years? Right from the moment that Sarbjit explains that, whilst she was born in Hounslow, London, UK in 1969 yet, when she started primary school in 1974, she could not speak a world of English(!) - I was shocked at a 'society within a society'.There are so many things to think about here that you have to read this story. It is simply explained - so the reading is easy - but the overall message is so hard to understand.Sarbjit belonged to a community within a community and she reached-out past thousands of years of social conditioning and, effectively, brain-washing, using nothing more than seeking fairness for both herself and her murdered Sister-in-law. As the foreword sought to explain, 'religion' can be used as a cloak for all sorts of subjugation and unfair treatments leading to the ultimate where the 'shame' of a woman seeking some sort of equality in a Sikh community was expunged by her killing. According to Sarbjit, a Sikh Guru directly ignored the fact that members of the Sikh community had killed a woman. He turned his wrath onto Sarbjit for 'dishonouring' their community by telling the truth to 'outsiders'. There is no religion there. Simply indoctrination and subjugation masquerading as 'religion'.At time, I screamed at the book for Sarbjit to 'tell the truth' to the Authorities over many, many episodes before she finally found herself in a situation where the truth had to come out. (no spoilers). By the end of the book, I am proud of Sarbjit, her family and British justice. less

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