As I begin to write this I hear Ahmad’s “Back in the day when I was young, I’m not a kid anymore but some days I sit and wish I was a kid again” which I was first introduced to through watching The Wood – which is also one of the top 5 Coming of Age movies that made the cut on another post I wrote.
Being 28 years old nearing 29, I realize that if I’m blessed enough to remain healthy, alive and productive then old man 30 will be here before I know it… and the last thing I want to be is 30+ struggling to accept my age and finding it hard to let go of the worst of my boyish habits.
So, here is a list for you, for me, and all of us “6 things brothers should let go of in their 30s”
Skipping Doctors visits; Listen! I know that there is a stigma that exists around going to the Doctor, and lets be real in some cases Doctors have done more harm than good, but at the very least by age 30 we should make an annual physical the norm, AND if you’re out here raw doggin with multiple sex partners you need to get checked up at a much more frequent rate than just one time a year.
Living at home with parents/other people; Bruh! Seriously, who wants to always be the inferior person in another persons home? No one will ever give you the respect you as a man NEED as long as they can say you’re “living under their roof”, let’s face the facts living with other people means you, to a certain degree have to live by or at least follow their rules when you’re in their house. You’re too grown to have a damn curfew, to not be able to go in the refrigerator when you want to. It’s better to be the man that makes the rules and not the “man” who has to follow the rules.
Smoking; Okay, I may be a little biased in this area… but oh well! I don’t think there is a right way to smoke tobacco, as someone who enjoys an occasional cigar, I realize smoking cigars are not healthy. So my personal goal is to stop, in addition to that I know there are some people who enjoy herb, ganja, weed, marijuana… know it’s better ways to consume it outside of rolling blunts, joints, backwoods, etc. If you are someone who knows you enjoy the herb, try vaping, or edibles. Those options are MUCH MORE healthier than smoking it. If you smoke cigarettes and or cigars just try and come up with a solid plan to stop.
Wearing baggy clothes; The day of baggy clothes have come and gone, and I doubt baggy pants and 3x tall tees will ever make a comeback. Believe it or not women look at what men wear, they look at how we wear it, coordination, etc. If you’re still sagging your pants, wearing too big clothes, chances are you scream “I’m stuck in my past and have no interest in changing”.
Always going to the club; We all need to have fun and enjoy ourselves, I’ve found that the regulars at the clubs are typically young people or young minded old people. Who think it’s fun to pay $300 for a place to sit and a $50 bottle just to have the process classified as “VIP”? I can’t believe I actually used to waste so much money doing that shit. Bars tend to be much more laid back, a place you can actually hold a conversation and don’t have to worry about little kids jumping around and throwing gang signs… If you’re a promoter or work in the club scene, by all means GET MONEY! But if not stay yo ass from always going to the club… ALL THE TIME.
Wasting money; “It’s your money, spend it how you want” true! However, why has this statement turned into “throw away every dollar is you want”? Money is a tool, and a powerful tool for a wise man. Buying expensive things, splurging and enjoying yourself is okay sometimes… but if you’re doing this and you don’t have investments, passive income streams, a business or two, you’re kind of digging yourself in a hole. If used right money can set you up to do some amazing and powerful things in the future, seriously! That’s one of the things we as black men must learn and remember. Stop wasting money, start making that shit work for you and bringing in more money.
What’s some things you’d add to the list?
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