Must (Not) See TV

I actually view not having seen beloved television shows as a badge of honor. I’ve even (proudly) described myself as the only black woman in America who doesn’t watch Scandal or Empire. There are several other shows I’ve never seen a single episode including ER, The Sopranos, Game of Thrones and (though thanks to Twitter, I know way too much about what’s going on). I’ve seen exactly one episode of Seinfeld—the finale. If you’ve seen the finale, you’ll understand when I say it went completely over my head. On the flip side, I’m also addicted to spoilers. Like I stopped watching Walking Dead over season two, yet I’ve read articles on subsequent seasons solely because the word spoiler was in the title. No shame in my must-know-everything game.

Dare I admit that I’ve never seen an episode of Game of Thrones or the Walking Dead? I just looked at TV Guide’s online list of some currently popular shows. I can add Empire and Riverdale to the list of shows I’ve never watched—or in this case, never even heard of. I’m reluctant to commit to a whole season of weekly viewing, if it turns out I really like a show. And hubs and I don’t have cable or network channels, so our TV viewing is pretty much limited to what’s available through Roku or Amazon Fire Stick. On the plus side, unless the show in question is an Amazon or Netflix original series, I usually don’t have access to it until the season’s over, so—binge watch! The one show I WILL commit to watch, and WILL actually stream through the computer to watch before the season is over, is X-Files, which has 10 new episodes starting Jan. 3, 2018, and about which I am ridiculously excited! #thetruthisoutthere

I regularly experience FOMO (fear of missing out) when it comes to popular TV shows. I feel a pang of jealousy when everyone excitedly talks about the latest Walking Dead or Game of Thrones, but they’re just not for me. (Of course, I didn’t think a show about a dying science teacher who makes meth was for me either, but I finally ended up binge-watching Breaking Bad and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever watched.) Since I worked in advertising, I always felt like I had no excuse not to watch Mad Men, but I just couldn’t get into it. And of course, everyone I ever worked with watched it religiously and loved it, leaving me to wonder, What’s wrong with me? But the show I’ve never felt guilty about skipping was Lost. I quit after the first season, and I always said if JJ Abrams ever explained that damned polar bear that maybe I’d go back. He never did, and I saved a full 100 hours of my life. No FOMO there!

The more I think about this question, the more I realize that I’ve missed out on a pretty long list of popular shows. Have not seen the following: 24, Lost, Walking Dead, Family Guy, Shameless, This is Us, Game of Thrones, or Breaking Bad. Some of them have been discussed and/or parodied so often, however, that they have seeped into my consciousness through pop-culture osmosis.  It’s sort of odd to recognize that you’re enjoying an allusion to a show you never saw…

I can literally quote all the shows listed above as ones I’ve never seen, although I loved Mad Men so much I wept when it ended. Sorry, M! But my dad was a literal Mad Man on Madison Avenue, so that show was my childhood. Without the philandering, happy to say.

But I’ll throw in a whole genre I’ve never seen: reality TV. That’s right, I’ve never, ever made it through an entire episode of a reality show. A few moments here and there of Dancing with the Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, or Average Joe – there goes that theme – and that’s it. A) I find them boring,  and B) I find shows like The Bachelor manufactured and annoying. But really, it’s mostly C: I hate to see adults yelled at, and then cry. Which seems to happen a lot in reality TV. And in sports play-off games. Oh, that’s another Must (Not) See TV event for me. Anything sports-related. Except the Olympics for gymnastics and ice skating. (I’m such a girl.)

Readers, what shows are you proud to say are on your “Never Seen” list? Drop us a note in the comments below!

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