Somehow we all survived graduation weekend.
It wasn’t the celebration I hoped for and anticipated when Josh was just an infant and I held him in my arms, envisioning the idyllic life he would have.
But, then again, as it’s been said, We make plans and God laughs. I just couldn’t grasp or comprehend how this Divine comedy would turn out and who would be chuckling when the final scene played out.
Taking an educated guess and basing my assumptions on how life was unfolding, I had a very strong feeling that I wouldn’t be the one rolling on the floor in a fit of uncontrolled hysteria when all was said and done.
Upon returning home from helping Josh move out of his frat, it was time to play another round of Musical Beds.
The only problem was I was the only active participant. The other members of our family, very comfortably and without disrupting their daily routines, got to stay put in their original slumber rooms. I felt like Goldilocks maneuvering around the Three Bears’ humble home, testing out numerous sleeping arrangements until “the one that was just right” became obvious.
In my case, it was not “just right,” but it definitely was a no-brainer. For all practical purposes, I had only one option left. Until the divorce was final and at that point, there was no way of knowing how long that would be, I would be sojourning in the basement, spending my evenings on the aging hide-a-bed sofa with the bulging springs in the mattress.
That final arrangement came as somewhat of a shock to me.
While Josh was still in school, he made it clear that when he moved back home, he wanted to live in the basement. He felt that it would be like having his own “space,” away from the rest of the family. The plan sounded ideal to me. While he was away at college, I took up residence in his room. I was actually getting quite comfortable and cozy in my teenage-aged sons’ enclave. Being surrounded by posters of athletic superstars was the motivating force I needed to fight the fight and fill me up with positive encouragement.
Michael Jordan’s mantras became mine too:
Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.
I’ve failed over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.
Obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
Yes, I felt driven and on the winning team when I locked the door to “my room” every evening.
Then, in what seemed like a last ditch effort at the end of a crucial game, Josh informed me in no uncertain terms, that he would be returning to his quarters.
What??? I didn’t see that coming. Who called that play?
When I questioned him about it, Josh became very defensive, cold and calculating. If I didn’t know better, I would have thought for sure I was conversing with Dick. They sounded exactly alike. In fact, Josh had Dick’s facial expression, demeanor and stance down pat.
Unfortunately, much to my dismay, the apple was not falling far from the tree.
Where did his sudden change in attitude come from?, I pondered to myself.
Over time, everything became crystal clear.
When Josh shared his plans with Dick for taking over the basement as his “home-within-the home,” Dick became livid and told Josh that he was not going to give up his bedroom for me. Furthermore, Dick informed him that this was Josh’s house and not mine.
Really??? I mean, REALLY???
Dick’s and my home was not mine, but it was my son’s???
Nothing could be further from the truth. Of course we had the documents to prove that the home was in both of our names. Josh was not a co-owner, nor would he become one at any time in the upcoming future.
Dick’s behavior and actions were becoming very frightening. He was no longer rational.
Unfortunately for me, I no longer had any privacy in my home. The basement was used by the family every day.
Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse and I’ve reached rock bottom, I was taken down to a new lower level…literally and figuratively.
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