If DI Alec Hardy found himself on a Goan bus, I'd pay to watch THAT show😹
Have I told ya about the people who’ve fallen asleep mid-bus journey with their heavy heads restin on my feeble shoulder? Aye, that’d be a rather strange topic to write on but I feel as if my head might come detached from my shoulders if I didn’t put my thoughts into words😁
Anyways, these people have never received a cold shoulder from me, may they be a drunk lass or an old lady. So, that brings the count to exactly 2 sleepy people, both o’ whom were women, by the way.
The first one was in her twenties, pissed as a newt and who’d possibly passed out on the beach after a night of hard partying (explains the sand in her clothes and in her hair….Sandy from head to toe, I tell ya!🙀 ) She instantly became the butt of jokes (mostly cracked by the smart arse conductor o’ the bus) as soon as she stumbled aboard and slumped down on the seat right beside me, leaving no way for me to escape! 😶
At first I was unnerved. She kept dozing off in the forward direction, almost tumbling off each time the driver braked and when she sank back into the seat drowsily, I brushed off the specks o’ sand that landed onto me.
It was when she started leanin on me that I began to pray silently! 👀
Dear Lord, I was crushed against the window when the drunk lass dozed off on me and I was gettin pity glances galore from the passengers who were lucky not to share a seat with her in a crowded bus. The strong stench o’ alcohol gripped my senses and I was transported to the memory o’ the drunk uncle who was forever humiliating me at family get togethers (I’m still an introvert when it comes to talkin face to face with people who aren’t my age, so it’s humiliatin when he tries to make me talk to him, even if it is in a teasin, drunk manner. I’d rather he left me alone with my better-scented, teen cousins with whom I can easily open up to).
Back to the drunk lass, she mumbled apologetically every time those bloodshot eyes o’ hers opened and she’d realized she’d squashed me!
When I’d finally pushed her off and got off at my stop, she’d left a large, dark, wet, salty and sandy stain on the side o’ my fav bright orange top. I’d to air it out and squeeze it dry, but it was wearable for the rest of the day…as long as no-one noticed and as long as my hands/ backpack strap stayed glue to an’ didn’t leave my side! 😅 I did shoot a pity glance towards the lady with the baby, who unfortunately was forced to sit beside the girl as she nodded off continuously on her shoulder now, opening her eyes only to slur sorry apologetically before passing out once more!
The second sleeper was a sweet old lady who nodded off on my shoulder and didn’t wake up until the bus halted at her stop. Not much to tell bout her, except that she was rather thankful about using my body as a pillow and even offered an explanation for her long nap with a grateful and toothless smile: A heavy dosage o’ pills prescribed to control her blood pressure had made her this sleepy. I shyly mumbled that’s alright and saw to it that she got off the bus safely, and before I knew it, she was trundlin along the street with a middle aged lady for company, hurlin up a heavy sack on her back sans any help from the other lady. That sack would’ve ended up bein twice her size if she’d stuffed anythin more in it. I’d heard about not operatin heavy machinery while heavily drugged…but, what’d it say bout carryin heavy sacks...oh, boy! 😅
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Christ! I hope both those ladies got home safely without noddin off along the way, without squashin anyone else or gettin squashed themselves! 😹
