You’d think after the two movies on the subject everyone would know that someone always ends up catching feelings and unfortunately in this story that person is me. I don’t like a lot of people so for me to get feelings for someone is a big thing, but then again it’s hard not too when the guy is so nice and funny and you can genuinely be yourself around them, how can you end up not feeling something for them? But unlike the films it doesn’t always end ‘happily ever after’.
Now after being single for a year after a 7 year relationship, I am in no place for a relationship and I don’t want one. But I am always honest and me and my ‘friend with benefits’ have always been honest with each other; so I told him I caught feelings for him and that we should probably end whatever it was that was going on between us as I in theory ‘broke the rules’. A part of me was hoping he’d tell me he felt the same, but of course he didn’t, we were just sleeping together and having fun, why would he? So here I am alone on a Saturday night writing about about how my honesty has resulted in me no longer having the best sex of my life.
So where do we go from here? I can’t say we were ‘friends’ before, but we became friends and I can only assume that, that will now end and I’m going to miss that. We had so much fun together, every time we together I would be in hysterics. I could truly be myself around him and not give a shit if I made a fool of myself and I was so brutally honest with him about my sex life what I wanted to try, what I have tried and even my personal life. It’s weird how someone can be in your life so such a short period of time and the thought of them not being there is saddening.
Who knows, maybe when I’m not in his life for a couple of weeks he’ll change his mind and realise he has feelings for me too, but I’m not holding my breath. I don’t know if I will ever partake in a ‘friends with benefits’ relationship again after this, but if I do I’ll make sure to following some strict rules:
- No going out on ‘dates’ – come over eat pizza, fuck and leave is how it should be
- No kissing hello and goodbye (or maybe no kissing in general)
- No texting every day – this is how you become attached
“A ‘friends with benefits’ in reality is telling you to your face that you’re good enough to fuck, but not good enough to invest feelings in.”
