I am surrounded by zombies, everywhere, they are simply not nice to me, or think, I have a huge ego, which is to diminish…. I am sure that there are many people who want and need slaves all around them, and I am one of them, just because I have had a shitty life with so many failures and missteps, that I ended up jobless and miserable, and now I am sure people see me as second class citizen, which probably is right, I am not first class at all, I am ugly and boring and all which is despisable ( is there such a word, no perhaps, see, a talented and intelligent person would know that, so I am obviously not one of those)…
Nobody knows my story, and nobody ever will…
I am all alone with me, and will stay that way…. nobody understands what I want, what I am or who I am… nobody loves me at all, or wants to be with me… nobody loves me.
Not even my family. This is all I ever know. Everything I do is completely without sense. Nothing makes sense at the moment.
I might even have to come to extreme measures, to start again in my life, to end it all and leave everything behind, just to start fresh, but I don’t even know if this is possible, after all that happened in my life.
The world is behind me.
Maybe it is wrong to wish for a equitable world, where everything is fair, maybe I am on a wrong path. Or maybe, I just lost my reasonable way of seeing things? I don’t know anymore. 
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