Having confidence might be one of the sexiest traits in a man and I’m sure if you asked any man, they’d say the same about women.
So why is it that so many men are lacking in this department? Now confidence is not to be confused with arrogance or even liquid courage. Having all the balls in the world after a couple of shots doesn’t mean shit if you can’t back it up when you’re sober.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m always the one that after a shot or two couldn’t care less if I make an ass out of myself – Especially on a wine tour when everyone else is too scared to hit on the hot sommelier and you can play the whole “excuse me, we’re from out of town. Where’s good to go out around here?” card. That one always works like a charm, even if you’re not from out of town.
All that aside though, I’m just as confident when I’m sober. Hot guy making eye contact with me? I’ll smile and wave and if he reciprocates, I’ll approach him. Cutie on Instagram replying to a story or two? I’ll ask him out.
Now I’m not a solid 10 by any means, if you ask my ex I’m a 6 and if you ask my boss I’m an 8 so who the fuck actually knows where I stand but my confidence definitely gives me an extra point or two on the scale.
You might remember from my post about that VERY eventful weekend which started with too many shots of Jaeger, I mentioned the guy I’d met when I was visiting friends and family a few weeks back. You know, the one who was pointlessly texting me but never asked me out.
Back story on this guy, let’s call him Dan… Saturday night I finish up at a family event and I’m straight on the phone to Anna knowing she’s on her way back from a wedding and we organise to meet at the local for a drink. Next thing you know, we’re getting kicked out at closing time so our group decides to head back to a friends place and play Cards Against Humanity (don’t judge us, we’re still awesome).
A couple of guys are with us and Dan happens to be one of them. I’m fairly certain they were thinking Cards Against Humanity was code for something else but no, that’s what we were really doing. They called it a night about an hour later and not too long after they left, I received a Facebook friend request from Dan. Of course, I’m giggling like a school girl because I’m hella intox at this point and I’d been checking him out whilst he was there so, I accept and straight away I get a message which reads “wanna sit on my face?”.
Now, let’s be real, normally this would warrant a straight up blocking but to his credit, he was trying to be funny considering that whilst they were there, we’d all been having a rather vulgar conversation about sitting on peoples faces (don’t even ask, I honestly don’t know).
So I’m stuck between deciding whether or not to jokingly play along or lose my shit and instead, I hand my phone to the girls and let them have some fun with it. Fast forward some good quality banter and he’s got my number on the premise of having a sober conversation the next day.
The middle part of this story is pretty standard, texting me flat out for a week or so and didn’t ask me out so I got bored with it – I know I made a point of saying I’ve got no shame in asking a guy out but sometimes it’s nice to leave the hard yards up to them.
Then last weekend, I get an unexpected text from him.. “Hey mate” Ahh. Fuck off, what?! So me being me, I’m blunt and giving him nothing to keep a conversation going yet somehow he managed to for a few exchanges. Then later that night, I get the obligatory “I’m drunk and going to exert my liquid courage on you” text from him – “You’re hot.” I’ve provided this conversation in screenshots because it just wouldn’t have the same effect if I tried to recap it.
In fairness, I probably didn’t need to be such a bitch about this but I was pretty fucking ropable at this point – I’m accused of being too flirty on what is almost a daily basis and I really don’t mean to be, I’m just hella friendly and can talk to anyone about anything. So how the fuck has this guy gotten it so wrong when I actually was flirting with him?!
And to top that off, the whole “batting above my average” comment pissed me off even more. I mean, I gave you my number and have been shamelessly flirting with you – Obviously I was interested but you just fucked that right up.
So basically this conversation went nowhere, he’s texted me a few more times trying to ask me out but the damage was done and I don’t think I’d be able to look at him the same after this.
If having confidence is one of the sexiest traits in a man, a lack thereof has got to be one of the most unattractive ones and it’s enough for me to go from planning our wedding to blocking his number.
And this my dear friends and followers, is probably why I’m going to be 48 with more cats than I can count – I set a pretty high standard and god have mercy on you if you can’t live up to that.
Until next time,
Kelly xx
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